"They might all be brats, but they are my brats!"
When asked what has been her greatest joy in life, 87-year-old hospice and breast cancer patient, Nancy replies, “by far, the most joy I have ever known has been raising my children...they might all be brats, but they are my brats!”
Life has not always been easy for this lively lady. Nancy is one of five children. As a fraternal twin, she felt “less than” and “compared to” her sister for most of her youth. She was exceptionally shy, very awkward and dealt with the challenges of dyslexia. She recalls being frequently corrected by her teachers (with a ruler) if she dared to write with her left hand. She adds, “it was considered an embarrassment in those days to be left-handed” and she struggled to “get through even the first paragraph of any book” which led to her quitting school as a freshman student.
Nancy married at age 19 and shortly thereafter, discovered she was going to have a child. Her firstborn was “so cute...he had a head of hair like his father, it was red.” Next, she would give birth to twin boys. She was a bit nervous about having “three boys to take care of” but settled into the idea. Unfortunately, one of the twins passed away within days of his birth from a congenital defect. It was excruciatingly difficult to express her sadness to others, so she “took a deep breath and continued on.” The young mother’s bad news would come in duplicate. Following the death of her son, she would lose her husband, at age 26. He had a heart attack while swimming, she was unaware of a heart condition.
With two boys in tow, Nancy remarried. Her second husband worked for a railroad company and traveled frequently. They would have two children, a boy, and a girl. This mother was often alone but enjoyed every minute of the time spent with her kids. After only a few years, her husband returned to his first wife and family in a nearby state. This left the nervous mother caring for four children. They survived on “love” and her limited income as a retail store clerk at “Petries” dress shop. “Those times were very difficult!” Nancy recalls telling her eldest child to “go pull the onions” (growing wild next to their home) “I needed something free to fry for dinner.”
“Have you ever heard of the saying, three strikes and you're out?” she asks in a joking manner, “well, let me tell you...I have...and I wasn’t going to be out!” So, Nancy would remarry for the third time. This marriage would stick. The pair had two additional children, another boy, and a girl. It was official, they were raising their blended family together. “It wasn’t easy, it wasn’t pretty, and sometimes, it wasn’t fun, but it had to be done.” And although Nancy found herself tolerating a difficult man who had overly strict and narrow-minded ideas when it came to raising their brew...they were making it work.
In 2006, after nearly 45 years, Nancy lost her husband, Lloyd to cancer. She, their children, and their grandchildren would stand at his bedside to say their goodbyes.
Among all of the challenges over the course of Nancy’s life; there were great moments of joy… those moments were spent with her kids. She thoroughly enjoyed their walks in the puddles after a good rainstorm, building snowmen and tossing snowballs, heading to a nearby park for a dip in the lake, attending the kid's school-related functions; sporting events, musicals, cheerleading and any other thing she could keep them involved in. She adds, “each child is very different, from their births to their personalities and interests, their likes and dislikes; each one is unique.”
This mother’s love for her half dozen is apparent, it twinkles in her bright blue eyes; sometimes through tears, sometimes in laughter and even through her slightly cranky and mischievous attitude. Nancy Emma Davis loves her children...she is my mother and I am her youngest “brat!”
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